Houseguests

Next week a friend from europe is coming to visit and bringing along her two teenaged daughters, ages 14 and 16.  We really enjoy having them visit (and going to visit them) but I always worry that it's too boring here!  We don't live in a tourist spot, so there's not a lot of interesting things to do.  They really enjoy going to the mall, so that's a definite way to spend a few of the days.  I'm not a mall person, but I don't mind going along with them and bringing a book to read while they shop 'til they drop.  I just don't want to come across as rude or unaccommodating, I'm not really sure what the "rules" are when you live in a boring place.

So far, our plans are going to the mall, having an American Fourth-of-July BBQ & watching the fireworks, going to the pool a lot (it's VERY hot here in the summer), visiting a local Conservatory, an art museum or two (and no, we don't live in Chicago or there would be no problem at all finding things to do), maybe a local working farm since we DO live in farm country. And that actually gives me another idea, visiting some Amish areas, since that is definitely a very regional thing and something they have never seen before & couldn't see anywhere else.

Food is another issue here.  Obviously, there is the cultural difference in foods.  She has made a lot of comments about our (and by "our", I mean American) breakfast cereals as being "gross" because they are brightly colored.  I think their (and by "their", I mean Swedish) are gross, because they look like something that was scraped off the floor in the forest.  We obviously have the "forest floor" cereals here too, I can't even imagine eating a bowl of that nasty.  To each their own I suppose.  I'll just happily munch away on my pebbles, which are healthy enough for me :)  But the other food issue is that we are VERY casual in the summer months.  We sleep in (she's an early riser), we eat when we're hungry, we generally just eat very light meals for dinner because it's so hot & no-one feels like cooking OR eating big meals.  I know when I've visited there, dinner is always a sit-down event.  Though I suspect that it's only while I'm there from what her kids have told me.  We'll muddle through somehow, figuring out what to eat each day for dinner as we go along.

Our house is also VERY noisy & active.  I have 6 children (only 5 of them are still at home though) and they are all 13 and under.  So it gets pretty crazy here, especially when you factor in their friends hanging out here too.  We are loud talkers, we argue loudly, joke around, etc.  Her house is very, very quiet.  When her kids come home from school, they go straight to their rooms, close the doors & that's it for the evening.  They come out for dinner but then go right back.  I like quiet time, don't get me wrong.  In fact, I NEED quiet time several times a day or I get SUPER grumpy.  But I also am so used to the (mostly) controlled chaos of our house that it is always difficult for me to adjust to all that quiet when I go to visit her.  So I can't imagine how rough it will be on them to have all of this NOISE all the time.  We also have 2 small dogs and 2 cats, so they add to the chaos, messes and noise.

Her spending budget is very large and mine is very small (like almost zero), so that's another issue.  We budget down to the penny here.  For everything: food, activities, snacks, admission costs, etc.  I don't want to come across as not-fun or a tightwad, but if you don't have it, you don't have it, right?

The good thing is, she is aware of all of these things and still wants to visit me :)  She's been here before, so it must not be TOO bad because this will be her 4th visit to the U.S. and each one was to visit us here in our boring old midwestern state.  I just have to remember that everything is exciting when you're visiting a new place, especially a foreign country.  She lives in Europe so there are lots of cool things to go see & do in her area.  But I'm sure to her, they are boring & ordinary. Even going to the grocery store when I visit her is exciting, so I have to remember the same will be true of her.  And this is America, we have Wal-Mart!

Someone needs to write a REAL etiquette book for REAL people when they have house guests.  Real people with big, noisy, messy families who live in boring, non-touristy parts of the country & aren't wealthy (we don't even have a McMansion, just a plain old 1970's suburban house (oh the humanity!)

However, we do have 4 bedrooms and thankfully, 2.5 bathrooms and a nice sized private back yard, so we won't be that cramped.  We do live in a big city.  I do have a car (she doesn't have a drivers license so I'm sure it's very refreshing to her that when we go somewhere while she's visiting me, we just hop in the car & go, not having to worry about bus/train schedules, finding a seat, waiting in the cold, etc).  We do have Target, Wal-Mart and four enormous shopping malls near us.  So maybe we aren't so boring after all. :)

I just worry too much.  I wonder what other people do when they have house guests?